Copyright © 2022. dave boles.
First printing September, 2022.
All rights reserved.
Printed in the United States of America.
No part of this book may be reproduced
in any manner whatsoever without written
permission except in the case of brief quotations
embodied in critical essays and articles.
Cover art: Life, Unfurled, by Bodhi
Back Cover Photograph of Author: Alex Monroe
Author Bio Photo: Mrs America
Images may not be used without permission.
ISBN: 979-8-9858444-8-1
Library Of Congress Control Number: 2022945131
A Lake House Publication
Cold River Press
15098 Lime Kiln Road
Grass Valley, CA 95949
For all coyotes
yet to be.
COYOTE
GATHERING...........................................................................11
COYOTE
CAMOUFLAGE.......................................................................12
COYOTE AND
SUPERGLUE..................................................................14
COYOTE’S
TATTOO...............................................................................19
FIELDS OF
NEWS....................................................................................20
COYOTE’S PILGRIM
SONG...................................................................22
COYOTE
VISION.....................................................................................25
PROLOGUE.........................................................................................27
THE
QUEST.........................................................................................29
THE
SWEAT.........................................................................................59
APOTHEOSIS......................................................................................95
EPILOGUE.........................................................................................145
Coyote opened his heart
to visions
of the ancestors
their memories guiding him
to a knowledge
long forgotten
a door opens on the side
of a mountain
Coyote, holding a brilliantly
colored parasol
strolls right in
there is talk
of lights at night
coming from the mountain;
have no fear
and ponder this no further
Coyote is widely known
for his lavish gatherings
up on the mountain top
where all are invited
if they heed his fervent call
Coyote woke me from a nap
one fine, Spring morning
my hammock had been left unattended
since Winter, it now called for my attention
I was rummaging around in your workshop
and I found this glorious, neon-pink spray can.
May I have it?
It took me a moment to comprehend what my
furry friend was asking of me
I use that paint for my constructions,
are you building something? I asked
Building something? No, nothing as pedestrian as that.
I was hoping I could enlist you to spray paint circles
all across my body with this neon-pink spray paint
Coyote stared at me for a moment
before returning his gaze, fondly, to the spray can
Why on earth would you want me to do that? I asked
Well, as you know, there are times when I show up
at the local bus stop to wave to the children
as they return home from school.
Yes, there have been many complaints
about you doing so. I believe you’ve been shot at
a handful of times too, weren’t you?
Coyote waved this off with a flick of his bushy tail
A mere misunderstanding. The children were not afraid,
it was that one soccer mom in the bright yellow SUV
that had the problem. Besides, who drives a bright
yellow SUV anyway?
Coyote had a point. I had often had the same thought
every time I saw that particular SUV. Who drives a car
with such a hideous color?
What does that have to do with painting pink circles
all over your body? I asked, wishing to return to my nap
in my hammock, on a fine, Spring day
Camouflage, he replied. They’ll never see me coming.
the egrets and geese
were creating such a racket
I could not hear myself think
after an entire morning of cacophonous noise
I walked onto my dock
and asked the swan what was going on
they’re upset with your friend, Coyote,
very upset indeed
I had spoken to Coyote many times in the past
about leaving the waterfowl alone
he has promised me they are off-limits,
I told the swan. he gave me his word
oh, no! it’s nothing like that
the swan lifted a wing and pointed
across the lake
Coyote is stuck in a tree
sure enough, as I followed swans wing tip
I could see Coyote, stuck, high in a tree
directly across the lake from my dock
I quickly jumped in my kayak
paddling to him as quick as I could
he called out to me
as I neared the shore
nice of you to finally arrive, he said
with more than a hint of irritation
why are you in a tree? I yelled up to him
a better question would be
why do I not come down?
as usual, Coyote presented
the most logical answer
being somewhat irritated
from all the noise that morning
I was in little mood to banter
quit screwing around and come down
from the tree, you’re upsetting
the entire lake
his response was immediate and succinct,
I cannot. I’m stuck.
then unstick yourself and come down,
I have no time for this
Coyote’s voice was small, almost a whisper,
I cannot, I am stuck, to the tree
I stood there, under the tree, a little
off to the side so I could see him
he did indeed seem to be stuck
to the tree
Coyote called down,
I don’t need to hear your laughter,
so don’t laugh. it’s your fault, anyway
my fault? I cried out
yes, your fault. remember last week
when you were raking up all the leaves?
I had spent an entire week
cleaning up leaves, what a chore it was
yes, what of it? I asked
and your youngest grandson, who was helping,
asked how you could keep the leaves from falling?
yes, I remember. what of it?
you told him that maybe if you were
to superglue the leaves to the tree
they would stay in place
and you wouldn’t have to rake them up?
the entire episode began to come clear
you tried to superglue leaves
to the tree, didn’t you?
I was simply trying to prove
whether it would work, or not
I refrained from laughing as not
to be rude, though a loud chuckle
or two managed to escape
I can hear that, Coyote called down
it’s not helping
I took a few moments to compose myself
are you glued to the tree? where did you
find the superglue?
my front paws are glued together.
the tube squirted out and now they’re stuck.
I got the glue from your workshop,
where do you think I got it from?
the chuckle kept growing
are you going to help me, or what?
I could not resist
I began to laugh uncontrollably
Coyote angrily called down,
again, not helping
after taking another few moments
and then trying with everything I could muster
not to laugh further, I called up to him
look, it might be a bit painful, but there will be no lasting
damage.
you are going to have to quickly
pull your paws apart,
simple as that
I could hear Coyote’s thoughts
as he contemplated this
avenue of escape
again, I called out, it will be
a bit painful, but you’ll survive.
besides, you’ve no other choice
a shrill howl filled the air,
bounding across the lake,
ricocheting against the hills
Coyote came crashing down
landing a few feet from me
he glared at me as he nursed his paws
good thing you were not higher up the tree,
I offered
Coyote merely limped off, not replying
to my attempt at levity
I noticed a small tube of superglue
was attached to his tail
but I was not going to be the one to tell him.
Coyote went to town
for a memorial tattoo
a portrait of a hedgehog he dated
years ago in college
handing the artist an old,
faded photograph
he pointed to his right hip
and the artist nodded in agreement
it took some time
to shave all the fur
but in the end
it certainly was beautiful.
Coyote rolled about
in a large field of magenta
his great, bushy tail
moving swiftly
back and forth
the tail moved
with no apparent care
or direction
What is the occasion,
I cried out
No real occasion,
was his reply
Egret tells me there
is a war going on, I shouted
Coyote stopped rolling about
and walked towards me
But there is always a war
going on, somewhere
So you felt it best
to roll in a field of magenta?
I considered watching the news
but this is much more informative.
Rolling on the ground is more informative
than watching the news? I asked
Oh, yes, indeed. The bees tell me
they’re bombing daisies.
Wiping out entire fields
of flowers.
I have not heard of this,
I told my illustrious friend
Of course you haven’t,
was his reply
You need to stop listening to the news
and roll in fields of magenta
That’s where the real news
can be found.
Coyote once told me
Of bucks in velvet
Writing words of prophets
In a late summer snow
Their heads bowing down
As they wrote words
Of comfort
Love, and Strength
Several owls
An aged beaver
And several youthful magpies
Were witness to their devotion
Their collective scratching
Into the earth
Left fine lines
With which to trap seeds
In the spring
After winters frost
Wildflowers bloomed
Where the bucks wrote
It was an amazing display
Of color
Of hope
Of redemption
Pilgrims traveled
To see such an exquisite display
Coming from distant lands
Far to the East
Their travels being long
Many never saw it
As the flowers fell victim
To rooting pigs searching for food
Coyote opened his heart
To the late arriving pilgrims
Holding vigil with his howls
He described to them the story
Sung his praises
Of bucks in velvet
Writing words of prophets
In a late summer snow
Coyote’s still tell this tale
Though the Pilgrims
No longer walk
Along a sacred path
Their world of love
Of devotion
A now bitter place
Filled with pestilence and war
Coyote’s words, though
Long into the night
Still fill the air
Reminding pilgrims to hold hope
In prayers they offer
Their thanks to Coyote
Remembering the magic
That all life contains
They chant their prayers
While searching the skies
For the slightest sign
Of a late Summer snow.
the problem with our current situation,
Coyote stated with sadness
is there are no longer quests to be taken
or magic to be followed
like trying to steer a rudderless ship
in a violent storm, I offered
yes, Coyote readily agreed
exactly that
winter had finally come to our lake. the fires of summer
had receded and a deep winter chill taken its place
in the mornings a magnificent wave of fog swirled above the
lake,
deciding if it wanted to soar upwards to the heavens or to settle
in
hiding the geese and swan that graced its lovely water
on afternoons when the fog had silently moved into heaven’s
realm
the mirror finish of the surface reflected everything around it
in minute detail. it was a magnificent sight to see
during these times not a breeze was to be felt,
only the stillness of the moment
I heard a familiar voice call out
at once recognizing my old friend’s voice
Coyote stood in my doorway, removing his long greatcoat
as he let himself in
it had been a while since the wily trickster
had graced me with his presence
I noticed Coyote carried a large, elaborately, and intricately
decorated leather tome. its clasp beaming brilliantly
as he entered my home
what is that you have there? I asked my old friend. a new book to
read
for the winter days ahead?
Coyote looked puzzled for a moment
before regaining his thoughts
it is not a book, he spoke quietly. it is a journal.
a very old and ancient one at that
he drew up a chair next to mine and placed the tome in my lap.
inside this old journal you will find encounters with visions of times past
smiling his sly smile, he deftly opened the book
while at the same time keeping it hidden from my sight
not an easy task by any means
how am I to see these “visions” of times past
if you do not allow me to view the book?
there was a small amount of irritation in my voice
as I was quite comfortable in my house that evening.
a grand meal of venison stew, replete with carrots,
potatoes, and peas had left me drowsy
the fire had been tended to all day and my home
was as warm and snug as could be. it wasn’t that I did not mind
Coyote visiting me, but I was, as I have stated, quite comfortable
you keep referring to it as a book. I keep telling you
it is a journal. can you please make at least the smallest of
attempts
at referring to it as a journal, and not a book?
the trickster seemed a tad cross and I made a mental note
to no longer call it a “book”
my apologies, old friend. I met no disrespect
Coyote waved my apology away, focusing his entire attention directly upon me.
this journal, he continued, contains information that predates the history of man. it has been handed down, generation to generation, through the ages, so the teaching of the ancestors would not be lost. it is, indeed, a phenomenal work
Coyote gazed into the distance for a long while, a slight twinkle appearing in his eyes as he appeared to come to some sort of conclusion
are you going to show me the journal, I again sounded cross, or not?
ashamed at being cross with my friend a second time
I moved to the wood stove to stoke the fire, adding a plump log of aged and cured oak to its glowing maw
when I returned I saw that Coyote had laid his journal open on the table before him, its weathered and well worn pages glowing in the reflection of the fire my wood stove provided. the oak log was becoming engulfed with fire and the intricate dance of firelight upon Coyote's journal was mesmerizing
here, Coyote spoke so gently that it was almost a whisper, is my journal. though I hesitate to say it is “mine”, for it belongs to all living things. I am only its current caretaker
he moved away from the table so that I might fully view the journal. the pages, as I have stated, were well worn and weathered. there were subtle, faded images on the pages, almost scratches, if you will. the more I viewed the two open pages the more the scratches seemed to form together to make images,
only to vanish as soon as I focused upon them
Coyote sat quietly across from me, watching me with intent, his very being seeming to glow brighter, then dimmer, with the images as they appeared, disappeared, then reappeared again
what kind of a journal, is this, I asked with amazement
I could not seem to take my eyes off of the journal. as strange as it seemed, when I focused on the pages before me, watching the images appear, disappear, then reappear again
I could see and feel the universe all around me,
as if it emanated directly from the journal
I went to turn the page but Coyote stepped in and stopped me, chuckling as he did so
not so fast, my friend. not so fast. you have much to learn before you can begin exploring the rest of this journal
his voice seemed to be an eternity away, a distant echo in the vastness of all that is
I became lost in its echo
a familiar paw reached in front of me and closed the leather bound tome, its clasp securely fastening with a sharp, metallic click
in an instant I was back at my kitchen table, though I could not tell you from where I had returned
there is much magic to encounter with my journal, the trickster eagerly informed me. you must learn how to use it wisely. this might take a while
the fire from my wood stove danced, but not as intensely as before. I moved to place another log onto the fire when I realized I had already placed a large piece of aged oak onto the fire
looking at a now nearly burned out ember where there used to be a fine oak specimen, I looked at Coyote with a sense of wonder
did I not just place a log on that fire? I asked him in amazement
you did, Coyote replied. though it has been a long while
since you placed it in your stove. it gave off a splendid heat. I thank you for that
Coyote walked over to his journal, picking it up with a deft lift from his right paw, while his greatcoat was hanging from his left
it is late, my friend. I have taken up enough of your time this evening. there will be plenty of time for you to become acquainted with my journal. I only wished to introduce you to it this evening. thank you again for the splendid fire. I can let myself out
is that the sun I see starting to crest the hill above the lake? I stared out of my picture window watching the sunrise in complete amazement at its beauty
it is indeed, Coyote quipped. your oak log burnt well throughout the night. I commend you on your wood curing technique
with that he donned his greatcoat, opened the door, and bid me good day, all in one smooth flourish
he called back to me as he jauntily walked down the stone path that leads to our lake;
I will stop by again. soon.
II
I was left both fascinated and intrigued by Coyote's visit, though truth be told I did not remember much of anything when it came to looking at his journal
I recalled looking at the markings, the scratches and images that seemed to flow upon the page, but other than that, nothing
I remembered Coyote bidding me a good day as he jauntily walked down the path to our lake, telling me he would drop by again soon, but that had been days ago
something about the whole experience had left me with a feeling of wonderment, and joy, simultaneously
in time, each day sprang forth, like every other day before it, as I anxiously awaited his visit
the cold of winter had definitely descended and even though I diligently worked at keeping my wood supply stocked, it never seemed to be enough
I sat out one brisk morning as the early fog was still lifting, to split more oak. The pine and cedar were well stocked, but during the cold, early morning hours, I could certainly use more oak
it was exactly on this morning, as I began splitting oak, that Coyote chose to come around
hello, my industrious friend, he joyfully cried out, do you ever rest?
he chuckled at his question as he picked up and examined a rather fine specimen of pine cone
this would have certainly hurt had it fallen on your head, he stated with certainty. best to keep an eye skyward these days
would that not be a waste of time? I replied
I cannot recall ever having a pine cone fall on my head
that you know of, he quickly shot back, chortling at what I assume was some sort of trickster humor
where have you been all these past days, I impatiently blurted out. I have so many questions for you
oh, here and there, that trail and this trail, you know how I travel
the answer was truthful enough as I had traveled with Coyote many times. if I were to tell you he walked in a direct and straightforward path, I would be lying. I have never met a creature as easily led astray as Coyote
Coyote smiled and smacked his lips,
I suppose you have many questions about the other night?
Coyote was, if nothing else, a master of understatement, to be certain
Coyote leaned in close to me, his eyes, piercing.
I could feel heat from deep inside me as he peered into my soul
what do you recall, if anything?
not much, I reluctantly replied. I wish I could remember more
Coyote continued with his examination
ah, said the trickster, I see you felt the universe breathing, alive within, and around you. very good. very good indeed
I dropped the maul I had been holding. it hit the moist ground with a deadened thud
I don't really remember anything. it's more like a feeling, a sensation. I remember placing a large log onto the fire, but nothing else,
except for feeling like I was connected with everything and everything was connected with me. the next thing I remember was seeing the log had burned down to a large ember and you were gathering your things to leave
it suddenly occurred to me that even though I had been trying, unsuccessfully, to decipher that strange night, I had not been able to recall a single thing. but now that Coyote was talking to me everything began to come flooding back
I remembered the strange sensation that everything was timeless
there was no time, yet, there was. there was not a past, nor a present, nor a future. it was as if all of time had merged together as one time. the past merged with the present, which merged with the future, which then began the cycle all over again. an endless eternity within an eternity of time
I struggled to relay this to Coyote, feeling childish as I did so
excellent! he replied. he had patiently listened to me as I rambled on and not once did I see him smirk, which for Coyote, was very rare
you traveled a great deal that night, but we will get to that later. tell me, do you remember what you saw on the pages of my journal?
his voice hung on the word “journal” as he waited for my reply
I only saw the two pages, I countered. I can only speak to those
yes. yes. two pages is all I allowed you to view, Coyote reverted back to his trickster self, but what, specifically, did you see on those two pages?
when I tried to recall the memory all I could remember were scratches, lines, moving, swimming, on the pages in front of me
the pages glowed! I suddenly shouted out
they were radiantly glowing with a gold and white light! and the images, they were glowing, too! but they were alternating colors as they glowed
I felt exhausted as I recalled the memory. it taxed my very being in bringing it to consciousness
Coyote had taken quite a few steps back from me as I recounted my memory. he stood watching me as if I were a captive animal in a cage
as he looked at me there were equal amounts of awe and wonderment, mixed in with equal amounts of sadness and empathy. speaking to me in a slow and deliberate voice, he motioned to me to sit down on a large oak round
what you have described most souls never encounter. very few are given the gift to travel time. you are one of those who have been granted this gift. I have suspected you had the ability to do so and have, over time, asked for permission to teach you
teach me? teach me what? and who did you ask permission from?
I could hardly contain myself and heard my questions asked before I realized I had even thought to ask them
you have always been impetuous when it comes to such discussions, why should this time be any different?
Coyote looked up at the sky, letting out a great belly laugh as he called out I told you he had the gift! to no one in particular
who are you talking to, I asked. and what is so funny?
it took a few moments for Coyote to regain his composure before he could answer me
well, he answered while trying not to laugh, the irony of you being called impetuous and you immediately taking umbrage to it, for one, and, of course, your question as to whom I was speaking to
what are talking about, I shouted at him
whom, the trickster said with a wide grin.
not who, but whom. it's an easy mistake to make. most people make it. as to whom, why the gods, of course!
Coyote was again up to his old tricks
I suddenly found myself grinning and laughing with him
okay, I finally stopped laughing long enough to ask him, what are you going on about? what has any of this to do with your journal?
and right there, under a great oak, the oldest on the lake, with my maul lying on the ground next to me, a few armfuls
of split wood laying about waiting to be stacked, Coyote leaned in close and whispered in my ear;
the journal is a portal of time. it allows its reader to have visions of time
I stood rigid as a board as what he told me sunk in.
a million questions swirled into my mind but not a one took form
I could hear the far-off cry of the swan on the lake telling a visiting goose not to come too close to its nest
far upstream I could make out the slap of a beaver's tail upon the water, firmly seating the latest addition to its house
a dragonfly flew by and winked at me, bringing me back to the moment and Coyote's inquisitive gaze
have you nothing to say? my friend politely asked
how do I control it?
III
I had not been entirely truthful with the wily trickster. while I did want to know how to control his journal, I had so many more questions to ask. Coyote knew as much and rolled on the ground filled with laughter
you want to know how to control it? he stammered out through great fits of laughter. that's all you want to know?
I had never been certain whether Coyote had the ability to cry, but that question was soon answered as I watched my friend laugh uncontrollably on the ground in front of me, tears of mirth streaming down his sharp nose.
well, of course I have more questions, that's just the first one that popped into my head! I shouted
I realized I was shouting, but I didn't care Coyote's continued laughter, bordering on convulsions, was starting to get to me
okay. okay. Coyote attempted to stop his laughter, only to begin again when he turned and looked at me, bringing on yet another round of full on hysterical glee
I could no longer stand his insipid hilarity
perhaps I should leave you to your mirth and go make us some tea?
yes, that would be fine, Coyote said standing in front of me. here, let me help you with some of this oak you have split. the fire will be needing it
we made our way inside with only a chortle or two from the trickster
I went to put the kettle on as Coyote walked around my den, studiously looking at my book collection
I have always admired your impressive collection of books it appears most of your books are about religious history, and philosophy
he removed one of my most cherished books,
The Secret Of The Golden Flower, by Richard Wilhelm, placing it upon my kitchen table as he examined it closely
i assume you have read this, he asked as he paged through the book
yes. In fact, i have read it several times
that would explain how you so readily adapted to my journal i have not shown it to many humans, but those i did show it to never reacted as strongly as you did
i knew i was right about you
Coyote continued to be enthralled with my books even as my kettle began letting out its distinctive scream
you keep stating that, i said. what are you right about? and why?
Coyote removed his gaze from the book in front of him and followed me as i prepared our tea
do you remember the time you raided my garden? he asked, as i placed his tea before him
i do, i replied with some chagrin
You ended up speaking with the ancestors and then through them came to understand both Earth Mother and the spirit world around us
Coyote eyed me carefully, eagerly awaiting my response
yes, i remember that. how can i forget?
Not too long ago i had raided Coyote's magical garden, consuming his salvia, sage of the diviners, along with assorted mushrooms and other psychotropic plants in a haphazardly thrown together cosmic salad. it was an experience i remembered quite clearly, telling my trickster friend as such
you went on a wonderful journey, my friend, that's for certain. you met the ancestors; grandfather bear, grandfather coyote and great-great grandmother turtle. they taught you about Earth Mother. no doubt it was a powerful experience
Coyote paused for a moment as he sipped his tea
i was hallucinating and speaking to three burned out oak stumps, i replied
indeed, Coyote cryptically replied
i vividly recalled the conversations i had with the ancestors, though in reality it was only my acute imagination taking form after ingesting items from Coyote's magical garden. to this day i still give that patch of ground a wide berth. i have not returned since
who knew what he was growing there now
as if reading my mind Coyote chimed in with i still grow much the same as i did before, though i have added a few more items that might interest you
he turned and winked at me as he took another sip of tea you should come see for yourself sometime
with mere mention of returning to his garden my entire being shuddered in revolt, only to be replaced with a strange sensation of calm and wonderment
i began seeing the outline of the three burned out stumps, watching them slowly take form of the ancestors once more, viewing it not as
a memory, but as an occurrence in real time
excellent tea! Coyote proclaimed, the finest around! that's what i always tell people; you make an excellent cup of tea!
Coyote sat across from me, studying me for what seemed an eternity
i knew after you had your meeting with the ancestors, and learning what Earth Mother teaches all sentient beings, you were marked for much greatness. that's why i told the gods you were a perfect candidate for the journal
you mean, your journal, i attempted to correct him
no, it is merely the journal. as i have told you before, it does not belong to me, i simply have current possession of it. it belongs to all of us. time belongs to no one, or to no thing
there was that riddle of time again. Coyote had mentioned it before, trying to explain to me how all time, past, present and future, were actually one time, an eternity of time swirling endlessly within itself. i did not understand this concept and told my friend as much
i know it is difficult for you to grasp, but you really need to look at the universe differently in order to understand it. when you were speaking with the ancestors, were you speaking with grandfather bear, grandfather coyote and great-great-grandmother turtle, or were you talking with three inanimate and burned out oak stumps?
we both know they were burned out stumps, i replied
do we? do we really? were they not real to you at the time? in the moment? when you think back on them, were they not real enough for you to believe they were real? did you not just begin to see them again?
Coyote had risen from the table and stood looking at me. how did he know i had started to see the ancestors take form again? was he guessing? bluffing? but if so, why?
admit it, the trickster challenged me, you've seen them take shape since then, many times, in fact, haven't you? you still feel Earth Mother coursing through your body
i do not have time for this nonsense, i half heartedly replied.
leave me to finish my tea
when you read this book for the first time, Coyote held up The Secret Of The Golden Flower, were you not intrigued by it?
of course i was
why, then, did you read it again and again and again? were you searching for something within the book itself? did the book seem to have a message that spoke to you? one that was, in a word, perhaps addicting?
Coyote left that thought hanging as he gingerly placed another piece of oak on the fire. the bits of dried moss that were still attached to its bark sparkled and flashed as they caught fire
Coyote had asked a most interesting question.
i had, in fact, reread that book many times over in a search for something, but i was never certain as to what. i admitted as much to him and commented that his term “addicting" was an apt description
looking at the titles in your bookshelf i am certain you have read many books that are similar in thought. correct?
yes, you are correct. as you can see i have many books along the same line. what of it?
Coyote pulled up a stool to sit and warm himself by the fire
some might say you study ancient religious theory, or perhaps sacred geometry, as i noted quite a few of those titles as well
the piece of oak had fully caught fire and gave off a splendid warmth, one that radiated throughout the body, warming to the very core
i have spent a great deal of time coming to understand these things, i do not deny that
i did not find his questioning offensive
in fact, it seemed to be putting me at ease
his eyes glowed with merriment as he spoke to me
the journal is similar to your books, in a general sort of way, though it is much more vast than those pitiful tomes you have on your shelf it will take you far beyond any theories about religion, or even the universe, as you humans like to call it, than anything you will ever read
he patiently sat by the fire, warming himself, waiting for my response
i cleared my throat a bit as it was suddenly difficult to speak
how is a book, my apologies, a journal, filled with
indecipherable
scratches and scribbles, more vast than any of my books?
i cannot even read the thing! i angrily exclaimed
you read it well enough to be gone for several hours, he quietly replied
but i don’t remember anything of it! i shouted
not a thing!
funny, he said in a somber tone, i recall you telling me that the
pages
were radiantly aglow with a gold and white light. seems like you
remembered something
upon hearing mention of the glowing gold and white light i was
transported
to a seat in front of the ancestors, in a cave that went deep into the
ground
there are many things you must remove from your mind before you
can
fully understand, said great-great-grandmother turtle
her voice filled the cave as she spoke
we will help you to understand the journal, to control it in as
much
as you can control it, said grandfather bear
i could not see his form but i could feel his breath upon me
things are never as they appear, my human friend. Grandfather
Coyote
smiled down at me from the roof of the cave, his voice drifting off
several lexical symbols danced in front of my eyes,
moving in what appeared to be a random and haphazard motion,
while at the same time filling my mind with a sense of supreme order
Coyote’s signature laughter could be clearly heard
i looked around and found him still sitting on the stool,
next to the fire, warming himself
i was sitting at my table, my cup of tea empty,
as i watched Coyote smiling at me
i keep telling you, i knew i was right about you. they know it too!
i began to ask a question, though Coyote quickly stopped me
that is enough for now. enjoy the fire. i will fetch a few more
pieces
of oak for you. come, sit here on the stool, it is nice and warm
Coyote turned and walked out the door, returning quickly
with an armful of wood
i still have many questions, i cried out
yes, you do, he replied
and with that, he turned and left once more.
IV
i did not see Coyote again for several weeks. i was ill with a
terrible fever
that only relaxed its hold on me after many strong cups of mushroom
tea
while sitting next to my fire under a mountain of old family quilts
fortunately, Coyote had helped to replenish my stacks of
firewood,
both inside my home, and the larger stack that i kept outside
on my covered porch. i had nearly exhausted both of these
supplies when my fever finally broke and i found myself in a
half-awake, half-asleep trance, sitting in my favorite chair
watching the embers of my fire glow as they turned to ash
hello, Coyote’s familiar voice rang out. is anyone at home?
Coyote immediately opened my door and let himself in
before i could answer, as was his custom
you look terrible, my friend, he stated with distinction.
and I am quite certain your home could use a good airing out
how long have you been ill?
i began to answer him but since i had not spoken in many days,
perhaps even weeks, it took me a few moments to find my voice
Coyote busied himself with opening windows and doors,
all the while excitedly jabbering on about his latest project
after we last spoke i began thinking about your books,
actually,
books in general, and how there have been so many of them written
through the
years...how to know which are the “right ones” if you will, to rely
upon?
yes, i have been quite ill, i managed to get out
so i can see. but you appear fine now, or at least you are past the
worst of it
can we talk more about my project?
having known Coyote for many years i knew it was a question
that was already answered
yes, please, go on about the books
it did not really bother me that Coyote was doing all of the
talking
as it was a struggle for me to find the strength in which to carry on my
end
of the conversation, if there was a part for me in the conversation at
all
as i was saying, i know you to be a voracious reader, in fact, if
words were gold i
suppose i could say you were guilty of avarice, but at any rate, i have
known you
to read a great many books filled mostly with history and religion
why do you suppose that is?
the sounds of his words bounced around and through me as i sat,
huddled in my chair in a somewhat trance-like state
no, seriously, the trickster suddenly stated, i would really like to know
Coyote’s long, slender nose appeared directly in front of me, his
eyes glowing with the ever-present combination of delight and
mischief for which he is so well known
take your time, my friend, i can see you are having difficulties
Coyote had opened my doors and windows allowing a light breeze to
sweep
through my home. its gentle touch ran across my face, a very slight,
yet distinctive, caress. i suddenly realized it had been days
since i had opened up my home and the new found breeze, along with
the
crisp scents of early Spring, filled me with a renewed vigor
i suppose i am drawn to those books as that is what interests me
but you and i have had long conversations about politics, or
philosophy, even
conversations on how best to build a dock. yet, i find few of these
books in your
library. no, without a doubt, the greatest number of your books are of
history
and religion. seems a bit odd, don’t you agree?
the trickster had taken a seat at my table and sat smiling at me.
hard as
i might try, i could not understand what he was up to, if anything
you will forgive me, i have been quite ill since i last saw you
i’m not certain that i am up for this conversation
the exertion required to state this alone was nearly enough to knock
me out
i was tired, fatigued, and had no wish to continue the
conversation
Coyote could care less
yes, i can see you are still ill and not up to your usual quick wit,
but no bother,
i can talk and you can sit there and simply listen. should i make you
some tea?
i nodded to him that would be fine. he set the kettle on the fire,
his large, bushy tail flicking back and forth as he did so
Coyote turned and looked directly at me. you recall the journal
that
i showed you, yes? he looked at me eagerly as he awaited my response
yes, i told him. how could i forget it?
excellent, he cried out
i think i will make you a strong herbal tea to give you energy
perhaps some ginseng as well?
that would be fine. why do you ask about the journal?
a dollop of honey? he asked
yes, that would be fine as well. again, why do you ask about the journal?
the trickster brought my tea, placing it on the table beside my chair, its aromatic steam filling my head with a renewed sense of relief
see, Coyote stated with joy, you are better already
i had to admit i was feeling much better, without even tasting the tea the aroma alone was enough to lift my spirits
yes, i agree, i am feeling better. now, what about the journal?
first, let's finish up our previous conversation. i believe the majority of your books are about history and religion because those are the questions that you are looking to answer. you have a keen mind, so books on politics and philosophy are not much use to you, and the few books you have detailing how to build structures are more instructive than anything else. no, you have a deep-seated need to understand the past, not just your past, but all past, as it relates to both history
and religion, as you believe them to be one and the same. how is the tea?
i was so involved with what Coyote was telling me i did not notice that i had taken several drinks from the teacup. i now felt its warmth course through my body as Coyote's words penetrated
excellent, i told him. but again, what is your point?
would you agree there have been tens of thousands, perhaps hundreds of thousands, of books written declaring themselves "true," when in fact none have been proved to be so?
i could see where Coyote was going with this as we had been down this path before
yes, i agree with you. how can so many books declare themselves "true" if they are all claiming themselves to be so?
exactly! Coyote shouted with such fervor i nearly spilled my remaining tea
has it ever occurred to you that these tens, perhaps hundreds, of thousands of books, they were all written during a time that is only known, not unknown?
the trickster had me at this statement
in truth, i had never considered it before
i am not certain if i understand the question, i pleaded in a weak voice
oh, come now. you are not that feeble-minded, even if you are still a bit ill you undoubtedly had several days of fever with your illness, correct?
i nodded that was the case
and in the past, you have had fevers as well, also correct?
yes, i stated somewhat irritated.
i have had a fever many times. what of it?
during those feverish times did you ever drift off and imagine, or perhaps even visualize, a time before time? a time that was alien to you, a time that you had never before read of, or heard of, yet it was as real as all the other times you knew of?
the air in my home suddenly grew still. there was no longer a breeze. no gentle caress. it was as if i were in a vacuum
Coyote placed his piercing stare upon me,
as if you pulled back a veil and could see past the world, to another
world?
as i went to answer him i could not speak. images from his journal danced brightly before me as a radiant and golden light began to fill the room
the images swirled together and made neither words nor symbols that i could decipher, but rather, they formed a light sound that when combined with the golden light, filled me with a deep sense of peace and understanding
there is no need to answer, i could hear Coyote tell me
i believed you to be ready to understand, but i can see now
there is much more i must show you, before you might be able to understand
his voice appeared as if he were from another universe. it was muted and soft, yet clear at the same time. the golden light became brighter as he spoke. the feeling within me, such a peaceful, understanding feeling, grew until i felt i would burst and my whole being, the entire universe,
would be consumed by the light
Coyote appeared before me, his mind telepathically telling me;
you are beginning to understand that which i have been sent to teach you. i will load in more wood and stoke your fire for you. i will make a small stew for your strength. please, sleep, regain your energy. you are going to need it
i felt his presence leave the room
i did not dream of anything as i slept,
not a thing at all
when i woke it was dark. there was a fine fire burning, a stew cooking in a pot and my home was closed up tight against the cold night air once more
i thought, perhaps, i heard Coyote calling off in the distance
i remember thinking as i drifted back off to sleep, why was there a veil to pull back? what lay on the other side?
Coyote came running up my path
followed by friend squirrel, rabbit,
fox, and a rather large, male mule deer
there you are, the trickster cried out
we have been looking for you everywhere
as he rested on my porch, composing himself,
the other animals gathered around anxiously
pacing while Coyote caught his breath
i was down in the cove, i explained
cleaning out the pond weed
upon hearing this all the animals stopped pacing
and stared at me
Coyote brushed the whole thing off
turning to his friends
he's a little strange, like i told you, but he's harmless
while the gathered animals snickered at my expense
giving themselves knowing looks of merriment
Coyote, now composed, approached me
the reason we are so excited, and also the reason
why we were searching for you, is that permission
has been given for you to attend our sweat
Coyote and the animals leaped in the air with joy
can you believe it, he turned to the animals
he's been given permission to sweat!
the animals jumped up and down, some spinning in circles,
the large deer snorted gleefully, bowing his magnificent
rack towards me, pawing the ground before him
i was left speechless
i had absolutely no idea as to what my trickster friend was up
to,
telling him as much
i'm not up to anything, he retorted
do you not realize the monumental importance of this?
Coyote stared at me for the longest while, swishing his tail
back and forth, staring at me for what seemed an eternity
perhaps you did not hear me correctly
Coyote cleared his throat and the animals again focused
on the wily trickster
you
have been granted permission to attend our sweat!
again the animals rejoiced, the deer bowed down gracefully
yes, yes, i stammered
but what, exactly, does that mean
for a moment, there was complete silence
i even believed i could hear the pond weeds growing
the animals stared at me with complete confusion
Coyote turned to them and calmed them, telling them
i did not fully understand the ways of nature, they
would have to forgive me and could they please remain
understanding
they seemed to agree with this line of thinking, milling about
on my lawn, muttering to each other, once in a while
looking at me as they smiled a rather unsettling
patronizing sort of smile
the gods have given me their blessing
to allow you to attend one of our sacred sweats,
surely you remember me speaking of these
he waited patiently as i struggled with my memory,
finally realizing that he had indeed told me of the many
sweats he had attended
forgive me, i said, you caught me by surprise
i do recall you regaling me with stories of your
sweats. i did not understand that you were speaking
of sweating with animals. i thought you meant humans
were your companions in those stories
all the animals snickered, friend squirrel gave Coyote
a playful nudge in the ribs
Coyote sighed a deep, long sigh
no doubt, that is what you thought, he told me
in an exasperating tone
while i have attended many sweats in the past
with humans, i have attended far more with my
animal brothers
again, all eyes were turned upon me, waiting for
my response
yes, of course, i hurriedly shouted out
you merely caught me off guard. of course i will
attend your sweat. when does it begin, i innocently asked
it already has, Coyote said, grinning from ear to ear,
winking at his furry companions
it already has.
we all rushed down the forest path, though
friend rabbit elected to stay behind with me
lest i became lost
not to worry, he called out
i know the way. been there many times
the hurried, almost frenzied pace
was taking its toll on me
it might be fine and well for animals
but humans, at least this human,
could not traverse a densely wooded path with their ease
how is he holding up, Coyote called out
try as i might, i could not see the wily trickster
through the dense undergrowth of the forest
slow as a rock and he's a bit winded, but he's fine, called out the rabbit
i would have attempted to defend what little honor
i might have had left, but in truth
i was exhausted
it was all i could do to continue on,
gasping for air the entire time
we forged down the path for what seemed hours
before i noticed Coyote, the deer, and the rest
of the animals gathered by the entrance
to what appeared to be a large cave
you look terrible, Coyote laughed
actually, friend rabbit offered
i thought he did quite well
the rest of the animals gleefully snorted
and danced about
as i offered a kind nod in the rabbits direction
we will let him rest here for a bit, Coyote told the animals
he will need his strength
friend raccoon, you will stay here with him until
he has caught his breath, and then take him to the pond
Coyote spoke with a most definite authority
and the animals readily listened
you others will come with me into the cave
and help me prepare
before i could question the trickster further
he was off into the cave with the other animals
the raccoon sat next to me, smiling
take your time, take your time,
it will take them a while to prepare
i sat upon a soft patch of moss and collected myself,
content to "take my time" as the raccoon offered
i finally felt well enough to move on and friend
raccoon led me down a small path
the end of which held a pond of
crystal clear water
you can drink from here, the raccoon offered
this water is the sweetest tasting water in the forest
i cupped my hands and placed them in the water
drawing up a nice bit to drink
the water, in a word, was amazing
i could not recall ever tasting such pure,
clear, and sweet water
the raccoon saw me smiling as i reached for another gulp
told you, he repeated himself, sweetest tasting water
in the forest
he took a few small drinks from the pond himself
then sat watching me until i had my fill
if you're ready, he offered, i'm sure they are
nearly finished
finished with what, i asked
with the preparations, he said with a bit too
much exasperation
he headed back down the small path,
making certain to not walk too fast
lest he lose me
when we arrived at the cave's entrance
he bid me sit back on my moss perch
as he went inside to see if Coyote
might be ready
i could hear his tiny voice call out
to Coyote, but then nothing else
eventually, Coyote appeared at the entrance
walking straight towards me
we are ready, he stated
the gods have again granted their approval
and the preparations are complete. are you ready?
without giving me a chance to answer
he took me by the arm and led me inside
i was going to protest
saying i had many questions
but Coyote smiled at me
his wide grin bright in the darkness of the cave
you may not speak, during the ceremony
unless directly spoken to, understood?
i nodded my head affirmatively
good, he whispered
you'll do just fine
and with that we went deep into the cave
heading towards a flickering light
that seemed to dance
with a luminous intensity i had not seen before.
we traveled down into the cave
for quite a while
remarkably, it was large and
i was able to walk upright the entire way
it was also a very wide cave as well
not only accommodating myself
but the great stag had more than enough
room for his massive rack
the cave's path ended in a large
somewhat circular room
of which i could not make out
its final size
there was an immense chimney
formed out of the rock
that shot straight up
illuminating the cave with a strange,
brilliant light, as if the sun was directly above it
not once moving in the sky
there were many stones, logs, piles of moss
gathered around a large pit
where the animals were building
what looked to be a rather impressive fire
as i entered the chamber
Coyote swept past me
his great, bushy tail
excitedly shaking back and forth
not too much pitch and sap, he stated with authority,
you'll remember what happened last time
you did that
his comment seemed to be directed
at friend fox, who sheepishly replied
he would never make that mistake again
the rest of the animals snorted with glee
and the stag went back to the entrance
returning with a load of wood lodged
in his great rack
to say i was in disbelief at what i was witnessing
would not do it justice,
none at all. i was dumbfounded
Coyote noticed my slack-jawed appearance, playfully telling the other animals, he probably never realized animals could make fire
this caused a great amount of laughter causing the stag to nearly lose his load of wood
friend squirrel climbed upon the stags antlers looking directly at me
Coyote requested you be able to attend our ceremony and the gods granted it
because you have shown you are powerfully different
than other humans
he tilted his head back and forth, looking at me with abject curiosity
i must admit, you do seem rather unique, he continued
you’ve never been known to harm an animal, growing your food instead of harvesting our meat,
though the fish in the lake would not be so charitable in their description of your behavior
a healthy snort was issued from the stag and the squirrel quickly scampered back to the ground
i looked over at Coyote who had been carefully studying me, watching my every reaction
what, exactly, is all of this, i asked
i already told you, we have invited you to our sweat. this cave is holy to us it has seen centuries of use for just such an occasion. it is a very spiritual and sacred place
when Coyote told us he had approval from the gods, a tiny chipmunk continued none of us believed him, at first
Coyote chuckled, well, can you blame them?
the animals gleefully chuckled as friend rabbit continued, but when Mescalito appeared
and said red hawks would be bringing the sacrament, and that we were to include you...
how could we do nothing else but believe? bellowed the stag
by this time the fire was roaring
it’s smoke drafting up through the chimney as it undoubtedly had for centuries
as its flames grew i could see more
of the chamber i was in, the strange luminous light now replaced with the fire’s own illuminating glow
the chamber was cavernous
and filled with images drawn into the soot on the walls
there were uncountable images, scrawls, lexical glyphs that emanated an ongoing story
it was not so much that i could "read"
the story, it was that i "felt"
the story
the markings reminded me of the images i briefly glanced upon in Coyote’s journal
when Mescalito appeared to us
giving us this task, the rabbit earnestly told me it was the first time in many, many millennia that a human was allowed into our ceremony, to partake of the sacrament that he gives
Coyote must have seen the puzzled look on my face, offering a quick reminder to me
i know i have spoken to you about peyote rituals in the past. you incorrectly assumed i was speaking of humans when i did so, i never said any different
i nodded agreement as my mind raced to grasp what was happening
in fact, he continued, Mescalito created a separate ritual centuries ago for humans to partake in, much more simplified, if you will,
than our own
upon hearing this all of the animals became quite solemn
you have proven yourself many times to be a powerful warrior, in your own unique way. the gods want you to continue an ancient tradition that has long been lost
why do the gods want me to partake in your ceremony? i asked to further the bonds between humans and animals?
we do not question the gods, Coyote said indignantly, we only do as they decree. their reasons, their purpose, is their own. we are here to carry out their wishes
an intense, flurry of activity occurred as a kettle of red-tailed hawks suddenly flew down the chimney!
they seemed untouched by any flame as they circled the great chamber dropping small cacti upon its floor
when the last hawk had dropped its cacti, and as quickly as they had appeared, they flew up the chimney and vanished, leaving only the sound of the fire to fill the cave
i looked at Coyote in amazement saying not a word
good, he replied, you remember my advice
he turned to the animals, who were now
seated upon the rocks, logs, and piles of moss gathered around the fire
stating, in a soft tone,
it has begun.
VIII
after the kettle of hawks flew out
and the quiet of the cave resumed i noticed daylight was no longer streaming in through the chimney
i was not aware of the time this happened only that it occurred sometime during the flurry of the red-tailed hawks dropping their cactus onto the cave floor
as i looked around at my animal companions their profiles standing out in the dancing flames of the communal fire, i noticed they had quickly gathered the dropped bits of cactus and had formed them into a large mound at the foot of Coyote
heeding Coyote’s words, i did not ask what was occurring though i did indeed have many questions
friend fox began shaking a rattle that i later determined was a group of rattlesnake beads placed into a dried gourd
the rhythmic shaking of his rattle soon overtook me and i sat transfixed by its sound
another sound entered the cave;
a low, almost moaning sound
that accompanied the fox’s rattle shaking
i looked across the fire where the great stag was seated and was both surprised and amazed that it was he who was creating this sound
the stags undulating rhythm
with fox’s quick, sharp rattles transported me
opening a path before me
Coyote moved towards me from the shadows offering me dried cactus
from a large bear skull
the rest of the animals anxiously watched as Coyote gestured, showing me to chew it
i took the cactus, placing it into my mouth
it had a dusty, earthy taste not unlike chewing on a piece of dried apricot, though far less sweet than that
Coyote nodded his approval and continued on moving around the circle in a clockwise motion until each animal had partaken of the cacti
we sat in silence, the flames of the fire dancing before us their shadows leaping to the far recesses of the chamber mixing with the lexical glyphs, joining them, adding to the already lengthy story upon its walls
there was no inference of time, outside of the fact i knew it was no longer daylight
the hypnotic rhythms of the stag and fox lulled me into a near dream state,
one that was comforting and warm
a paw reached out to me,
it was the raccoon
offering me a gourd filled with water
i remember taking a drink from the gourd as the stag and the fox continued with their rhythms
at once i felt myself flying through the hole of the chimney
i looked down upon myself sitting around the fire with Coyote and the animals yet, still, i was above us all
Coyote looked up from where he was sitting and seemingly winked at me
two of the squirrels
did the same, smiling beatifically
as they did so
their smiles calmed me, as did Coyote's playful wink
and i continued my ascent past the opening of the chimney
past the night sky
past the earth itself
a graceful warmth surrounded me
as i realized the connection everything has
to every thing
all animals are connected with each other
all plants, trees, all matter of life
are interconnected
to each other
there was not any one, solitary thing
everything was every thing, all at once
everywhere
two exceptionally large, beautiful, blood red
dahlias, opened up before me
i was no longer in the cave
nor the chamber
nor earth
nor space
i was being drawn inside the florets
of one of these magnificent flowers
my body decreasing in size
as i was drawn further into the dahlia
piercing through the center
darkness encompassed me
there was not a sound
no sight
nothing
only darkness
gradually, a handful of glowing lights appeared
and with them, voices
at first the lights were barely perceptible
as though they were at a great distance from me
as their intensity began to grow
the voices went from low murmurs
to a communal song
each voice singing their own composition
with all of the voices comprising
one grand melody
if i listened intently, i could hear nothing
but if i merely left my mind open
not focusing on any one thing
i could listen to them all
i could hear and understand
all of them at once
one voice, above the others, greeted me
filling my body with a radiant light
it identified itself as Mescalito,
and thanked me for taking part
in his ceremony
the other voices rose up
far too many to count
offering me their best wishes
thanking me as well
Mescalito's song again became the only song
i heard, as the other voices faded into
a low, background harmony
i went to speak to Mescalito
as i had many questions
but my mouth could not form words
a beautiful set of twin mermaids
swam before me
winding their bodies against mine
softly guiding me downwards
i panicked for a moment,
thinking if mermaids were taking me down
surely i was drowning
but within that thought came another;
the mermaids reassuring me to trust them
to let them guide me
i listened as Mescalito's voice
his song
began to fade as well
one of the mermaids leaned close
whispering in my ear
he approves
as we continued descending
i noticed the mermaid's tales
leaving marks upon the chamber walls
i felt them gently place me
onto its floor
the rhythmic sounds of the great stag
and the fox
began to return
i was able to see a hint of the fire
though that was all i could see
i heard Coyote speaking,
he has done well,
let him rest
and then i felt nothing more.
IX
a perfect beam of light
shined into the cave from the chimney
its pale illumination revealed
a spectacular image, animals of all kinds
entwined together around the remains
of a great fire, its charred timbers
faintly glowing
i attempted to rise
but felt a large, heavy paw
holding me down
you need to rest, brother bear declared
we all need to rest
the great bear rolled onto his side
snoring loudly
thinking he might be sound asleep
i started to raise myself up
i wouldn't move too quickly, a familiar
voice chuckled
it was Coyote
sitting across the pile
of entwined animals
his sharp eyes gleaming
in the pale illumination
he sat calmly watching me
his long stemmed, fanciful pipe
emitting the smallest amount
of smoke from its bowl
it was difficult for me to focus
much less speak
i attempted to question Coyote
over and again, but my words came out
mute
give it some time, Coyote chuckled again
brother bear has it right,
you need to rest
with that he ventured closer
bringing me a large, hollowed out
gourd which contained the sweet
nectar of the spring
offering it to me he paused
before handing it over
drink slowly, he said with authority
do not rush these things
i gingerly took the gourd, lightly
drinking from it
i could feel the waters healing presence
glide down my body
soothing me, nurturing me
until i began to feel whole again
i looked over at Coyote, who had moved
to the side of the cave again
i tried to formulate words
moving words from my mind
to my mouth
then out into the world
Coyote took a long draw from his pipe
letting the smoke out in a majestic plume
that swirled upwards through the chimney
you have many, many questions,
he bluntly stated
sit, drink some more, take your time
there is time enough for all your questions
i felt movement all around me
the animals were slowly waking
i could recall a few animals
when we began the sweat
but now there were several dozen
including brother bear
Coyote again seemed to sense my question
or i suppose he merely watched my eyes
before answering,
yes, many friends joined us during the sweat
as i sat up further i could tell immediately
he was right
a massive pile of animals
lay on the cave floor
for as far as the light could reach
when news spread that a human
was allowed to attend our sweat
animals came from miles around
to be a part of it
Coyote took another long pull from his pipe
to say you are a bit of celebrity would be
doing you a great disservice
everyone wanted to see for themselves
how your experience would be
i took a long drink of the magical water
feeling its healing power once again
course through my body, my soul,
my mind, was becoming clear
telling me i could speak again
how long have i been here,
i cautiously asked
you have been here for exactly
three days, Coyote replied
i attempted to understand
believing it was merely the next morning
you had quite the experience, the trickster
smiled, quite the experience indeed
several of the animals had now awakened
and were beginning to move towards
the mouth of the cave
waving to Coyote as they did so,
turning to smile at me
one last time before they left
out of sight
brother bear was still beside me
snoring heavily
he was tasked with guarding you, Coyote explained
he was with you the entire time,
he is exhausted
as if to emphasize Coyote's words
the bear gave a mighty snort
before resuming his rhythmical snoring
Coyote and i sat in silence, listening to
brother bear snore
watching the pale illumination
flicker around the cave,
the animals, one by one,
slowly leaving the cave
each one stopping to smile at me
before they left
visions of blood red dahlias
began floating through my mind
as i began to focus upon them
i soon realized i was no longer
in the cave, i was underwater
in the cave, I was underwater
a perfect calm quickly came over me
there was no fear, no thought
other than the imagery of dahlias
before me
as I sat
underwater
the more I focused on the flowers
the more I began to feel my breathing
flowing with its rhythm
I breathed in
breathed out
the flowers becoming a deep
rich color, all colors, all at once
the more I focused on the changing colors
the more I rose through the water
until I was no longer underwater
I was ascending through the chimney
I looked down at Coyote
the great sleeping bear
I could see all around me as
the few remaining animals left
there are hundreds of them,
I thought out loud
yes, there was, two voices answered
in perfect harmony and unison
I looked beneath me and two
exquisitely radiant mermaids
were guiding me up
past the chimneys opening
as soon as I was free from the cave
the sun blinded me
with its brilliance
the light penetrated my very soul
illuminating every fault, every virtue
I possessed
I again felt the interconnectedness
of everything to everything
with that revelation of connectedness
the sun vanished
and I was once again
in the dark of space
curiously, space was filled
with millions of subtle
glowing colors
a voice spoke to me,
the same I had heard before
during the ceremony
you have done well, the voice spoke
we have chosen wisely, a chorus
of voices echoed
you have learned much,
but it will take a long while
to fully understand it all
there was a collective murmuring
of agreement
Coyote will help guide you
heed his advice
with that a large, perfectly formed
dahlia appeared before me
I watched myself exit from within it
the sound of the voice
softly blowing against its petals
completely exiting the exquisite flower
I felt the mermaids
guiding me back towards earth
smiling to me benevolently
we passed by the sun once more
entering back into the cave
the mermaids left me on the cave floor
directly across from Coyote
I awoke in supplication
my mind clear, my senses intact
brother bear was no longer with us
as were none of the animals
left in the cave
Coyote and I sat across
from each other
me in my position of humble prayer
Coyote still smoking
his enchanted pipe
you have witnessed many things,
he spoke
a lot of information has been shown to you
though it will take time to understand it all
I nodded my head in slow agreement
am I still under the influence
of the peyote, I asked
Coyote chuckled
the sweat, the ceremony, is designed
to break down the barriers
you have been placing before you
your entire life
Coyote leaned in closely,
gesturing around him as he did so
none of this is real,
all of this is real,
it is you who chooses
what to see
at once
I understood him
completely
what do you recall most, he questioned
what stands out amongst all else that you
saw, heard, or felt
I watched the merriment in his
eyes
dancing as if performing
an intricate dance
dahlias, gods, and mermaids, I replied
is that all? he asked
my connectedness to everything alive,
my connectedness to the universe
and it to me
the knowledge that all
is one energy, one love
we sat in silence for some time
I could tell by the fading light
it was no longer daylight
night had come again
I laughed out loud, realizing it did not matter
if it was day, or night,
it simply was
as was I
as was Coyote
as are we all
I walked towards
the mouth of the cave
it was time to return home.
as I left the mouth of the cave
I saw the forest before me as never before
the subtle shades of green
the movement of light through the trees
even the moss rocks
seemed to glow with an otherworldly
essence
I sat upon the large moss rock
at the mouth of the cave
rejoicing in the beauty around me
it is beautiful, is it not? asked Coyote
extremely, was all I could manage
as I inhaled the magic of the forest
it suddenly occurred to me
we had traveled a great distance
Coyote must have sensed this
as he turned and looked at me
saying, perhaps you should fly home
any other time I would have believed
Coyote was simply being Coyote
but as soon as he suggested flying home
I spotted a large hawk not six feet away
who seemed to be looking directly at me
he was perched on a branch
in a large digger pine
his red tail feathers a tell-tale sign
he was sent by Mescalito
perhaps you should ask him
for permission to fly you home,
I heard Coyote tell me
I looked directly at the hawk
our eyes locked in communion
he seemed to be telling me he would be
honored
to fly me home
I am much too large
for that bird to carry me,
I laughingly told Coyote
while still locked into communion
with the hawk
then become the hawk, Coyote told me
in an instant I was airborne
I was no longer seated on the large
moss rock
at the mouth of the cave
I was soaring up into the sky
the forest quickly falling beneath me
I saw Coyote running swiftly
down a path
the entire forest
stretched out before me
I was not on the great bird,
I was the great bird
we, or rather I,
swept down lower
to call out to Coyote
but I had no voice other than
a sharp screech
which Coyote must have heard.
as he looked up directly at me
smiling from ear to ear
his unmistakable trickster smile
a few moments earlier
I had pondered how far it was
to my home by the lake
now, as I flew ever faster
my home quickly came into view
I circled the lake a few times
noticing my garden needed attention
and the dock could certainly use
a new coat of paint
I did not so much as land
as I found myself sitting at my table
a fine cup of tea before me
with Coyote entering the room
marvelous, wasn't it? he cried out
and I've arrived just in time for tea
Coyote helped himself to a cup of tea
as he sat down at the table
across from me
how was that possible? I stammered
I flew home with the hawk!
technically, Coyote pointed out
you were the hawk. he gave you
permission to join with him
so you might fly home
the sensations of flying
above the forest
of circling the lake
of feeling the freedom
of the air was fresh with me
but, I still questioned, how?
as I asked the question I noticed Coyote’s journal on the table before me, which I had not noticed before
do you believe the answer to be
in my journal? the trickster asked
I sat transfixed by the tome
watching it as it sat on my table
appearing to breathe
as if it were alive
Coyote’s question rang in my ears
I moved to touch the journal
but stopped shy of actually touching it
allowing my hands to hover
just above it
feeling its warmth
embracing its energy
at once I heard a rustling
overhead
I looked up to my ceiling
and to my surprise
found the two mermaids
slowly circling above me
they smiled as they flipped
their tails, vanishing through my roof
into the ether
Coyote must have seen my
look of astonishment
as he raised his tea cup to me
stating, all is real, nothing is real
I felt his tail curling around me
he was now right next to me
no longer sitting across from me
when did he move?
you will find all you need
within this journal, but something tells me
you think you no longer need it
he slyly winked at me
as he helped himself
to more tea
perhaps we can again discuss
what you saw during the sweat
he was back sitting across from me
his face as solemn as I had ever seen it
what sensations, what experiences
did you encounter? it does not matter
how trivial you might believe them to be
as they all have tremendous value
dahlias, gods and mermaids, I replied
yes, you have said as much
and the feeling that everything is connected
to every thing, I again exclaimed
so you said as well. can that explain
how you flew home as a hawk?
or how you saw mermaids
swimming on your ceiling?
Coyote seemed transfixed by the tea
in front of him, staring intently
into the cup
the journal was still before me
glowing, breathing
as if alive
it was alive
a sharp sound awakened me
from my reverie
it was me, coming into my home
opening my door
calling out to Coyote as I did so,
wonderful, you’ve already made tea!
I sat transfixed by the bizarre situation
before me
I was sitting at the table
talking with Coyote
as I was walking into my home
talking with Coyote
I felt myself being both places
both beings
at once
there was not a lapse in time
nor was there a feeling
of déjà vu
it was simply a matter of
watching myself
watching myself
a flurry of images began running
through my two minds
while I could sense an independence
from one another
I could also sense a combined
synchronicity of my two selves
I felt brother bear’s
hefty paw holding me down
I could see friend raccoon
handing me a gourd filled with water
tasting the sweetness
of the water as I drank it
I saw myself at the table
as I walked towards it
watching myself from the table
walking from my door
none of this felt unpleasant
at first it was somewhat disorienting
but I quickly became aware
that we were both one in the same
a grand sense of peace filled me,
both of me as Coyote
at smiling across from me
at the table
I moved closer to the table
and sat where I was already sitting
merging my two selves into one
Coyote reached across and poured me
a fresh cup of tea
I commend you, he stated
on your calmness
at once I understood him
I was calm, serene even
nothing felt out of the ordinary
in fact, everything felt exceptionally
ordinary
I looked upwards and waved
at the mermaids as they re-emerged
from my ceiling
both of them holding dahlias
handing them down to me
as they drew closer
with little effort I drifted inside
the magnificent flowers
both of me, at once
I had separated once again
one of me going with one mermaid
the other of me going
with the other mermaid
wrapped within the soft petals
of the dahlias
the mermaids again swam
through the ceiling
up into the sky
up into space
where they kept on swimming
Coyote appeared before us
though he spoke with
Mescalito’s voice
look around you, he told me
what do you see?
I was whole again
there was only one of me
and I was no longer
inside the flowers
I was back in the cave
atop of large pile of animals
I described what I saw to Mescalito
or was it Coyote?
at once I did not care,
I simply understood they were both
one in the same
I was a part of them, they were a part of me
as we were a part of the animals
the hawk I had seen earlier
called to me from the mouth
of the cave
we again locked in communion
each of us knowing the other
and I again
took flight
we again circled my lake
and I again
realized my dock
needed a new coat of paint
I found myself at my table
drinking tea with Coyote
the merriment in his eyes
lighting the room
he once again complimented me
on my calmness
pushing his journal towards me
as he did so
I once more felt the journal breathe,
felt its glow warming my soul
I do not need your journal, I told my friend
I understand your message
it is still a useful tool, he replied,
continuing to push it towards me
a playful giggle could be heard
as a mermaid helped push the journal
towards me
this journal, this magic, if you will,
can guide you further. you have earned
the privilege of merging with it,
take it, it is yours. it will help increase
your vision
upon hearing the word vision
a realization dawned on me
I can further answer your question!
I excitedly shouted to Coyote
I saw not only dahlias, gods
and mermaids, but I saw all of
life, showering down upon the earth
as if it were rain upon the ground!
most excellent indeed! cried my friend
I was hoping you would say that!
Coyote got up from his table
and danced a bit of a jig
ending up beside me
his nose against mine
all of life is around us
everywhere, constantly,
he softly stated
you are one with the hawk,
you are one with the mermaids,
with all the animals, you are one with everything!
he pulled back from me and eyed me
cautiously
you still don’t believe me, he said
with a touch of sadness in his voice
after all I have shown you?
I do, it’s just that, but he was quick
and cut me off
let me guess, your books, your “science” as you know it, have already explained this to you
Coyote sat back on his chair with a joyful look in his eye, which was surprising as I thought he would be a little angry with me
yes, somewhat, I agreed
you have shown me tremendous things of that there is no doubt
but I already understood the concept
of all life bombarding earth from space
I at once felt foolish, though I was not certain why as I had indeed come to that understanding a while ago in my studies
I’m quite certain you even have a name for it, Coyote smirked as he asked. Correct?
actually, yes. it is called panspermia, I triumphantly announced to the wily trickster
Coyote rolled on the floor with glee
panspermia, he gasped,
in between great bouts of laughter
that’s what you call it?
well, yes. it is a rather new science...
Coyote stopped his laughter at the mention of science, again appearing before me his nose next to mine
this, new science, is it relatively new? say, within the past, maybe, last few decades?
I pushed back from Coyote as I answered him feeling somewhat superior to him as apparently he had never heard of panspermia
yes, it is a new field of study, a new field of science, if you will
Coyote stepped back even further again falling to the floor in laughter
why do you find this so amusing, I asked with a fair amount of agitation in my voice
I show you magic and wonders beyond your dreams
and you tell me you already know of it, calling it panspermia
Coyote looked at me
as you might look at a small child attempting to answer them as to why there is air
tell me, Coyote continued, does this panspermia also explain how you can fly as a bird?
I did not have an answer
knowing as much he continued
did you know an ancient greek, Anaxagoras, I believe was his name, was the first to discuss panspermia, back in your 5th century BC?
I did not and I told Coyote as much
you might ask yourself how Anaxagoras came upon such a theory, especially in the 5th century BC, when humans were little more than illuminated monkeys?
you were told, Coyote continued, that you were allowed to attend our sweat in an attempt at connecting with humans once again
so that we might connect with the one life form that continues to resist change, believing they are superior to all...humans
Coyote looked completely dejected at this point, and I felt as if I had betrayed a great trust
I’ll leave you with your science, he said as he opened my door
we will talk again further, but right now I will leave you to contemplate
your immense arrogance
with that he left me
as did the mermaids
as did the dahlias
as did any sense of understanding I might have previously felt.
I did not hear from Coyote for several days and no longer saw dahlias or mermaids
floating along my ceiling
I did, however, catch glimpses shadows, really
moving in the distance
I would turn to these shadows but as I did so they would just as suddenly disappear
I could not shake the unmistakable feeling or being connected
to several places at once
of not being watched
but connected
to many places at once
Coyote had left his journal on the table
not taking it with him
when he left
I studied it for days
never once opening it
I sat with it as I drank morning tea it kept me company through meals all the while breathing on my table
glowing, calling to me
in a language without sound
I pulled many of my own books down from my library
I searched the Ramayana, the Mahabharata, the Epic of Gilgamesh,
the Enuma Elish,
I even opened an old copy of the Book Of Enoch, given to me years ago by none other than Coyote
in the end
I had no answers
I was left with the journal
glowing
breathing
on the table in front of me
this went on for several days
on the twelfth day I heard a light
tapping
on my window
I peered out the window but saw not a thing
thinking it was my imagination I turned back to my table
there, sitting across the table, as if nothing had changed was Coyote, sipping his tea
I see you’ve been busy with your studies, as he waved his paws about the table
anything interesting? he asked
he motioned for me to sit pouring me another cup
how is it that you make the most finest of tea, he marveled
I was too ashamed to say anything not certain how to
approach the subject
do you think you are the first,
Coyote asked, to be conflicted
as to what I teach?
his eyes sparkled with the familiar mischief
I have come to know so well
you have spent a lifetime seeking
answers to questions you are not certain even exist at all
he continued, but when given these answers the first thing you do is to relate them to that which you know,
that which you understand
I did not say a word
these books here in front of you on the table, next to my journal they are all open, yet my journal remains closed,
why is that?
as I looked upon my table that did
seem to be an obvious question
many books lay opened upon my table Coyote’s journal
was the only one that remained closed
I do not sense that you fear the journal, Coyote stated with authority
you had mentioned to me you did not need to open it as you understood
everything I showed you
with this Coyote sat back in his chair studying me, casually looking through my books upon the table
do you, he leaned across the table really believe you understand?
a slight movement to my side was followed by a soft caressing touch on my cheek
the mermaids had returned
you have nothing to fear, they said to me in unison
then softly whispering, you cannot go further until you understand your previous wisdom was founded upon lies, treachery and deceit
Coyote let out a slight chuckle, lighting his pipe as he did
the mermaids are wise, he said between great puffs on his long, enchanted pipe
in all the time I had known Coyote and in all the times I saw him smoking I never once saw him filling his pipe
not once
Coyote blew a magnificent series of rings that circled the room landing uniformly
on the mermaid’s tails
let me tell you a story, he said
or, rather, a history
Coyote leaned back into his chair
and took another long pull
from his enchanted pipe
humans, such as yourself
have been contacted by me,
or my ancestors, for ages
the gods granted us oversight
over humans
many tens of thousands
of years ago
back when you were all still...
illuminated monkeys, i asked
Coyote chuckled at this
yes, though that term,
at least amongst the animals,
has been determined to be derogatory
how so, i inquired
the monkeys were greatly offended
by the comparison of humans
to them. It was deemed an egregious error
and after much debate, for many, many centuries
it was determined that calling humans
illuminated monkeys
was indeed slandering the good standing
of monkeys and their good name
after much arbitration
restitution was finally agreed upon
the disuse of that term being
chief among them
but why do you still say it, i asked
habit, mostly, the trickster replied
plus when working with humans
it always seems to provoke a response
when used in just the right manner
Coyote again chuckled, taking
several long draws from his pipe
the mermaids had once again
swam to the ceiling
disappearing to the ether
as quickly as they had
appeared
several minutes went by
though it seemed as if time had ceased
to exist at all
if i may continue, Coyote said
carefully laying his pipe on the table
before him
throughout time i, or my ancestors, have helped to
educate humans as to the ways
of nature
sadly, it always ended the same;
they eventually destroyed themselves
what i have shown you is the incredible
magic
of the universe
it is within all living things
everywhere, in every thing
these books you have looked through
here on the table
were written by many of the civilizations
we attempted to educate
he looked solemnly at the table
you can see what happened
i had to agree with Coyote on this
in every story, from every culture i had read from,
there existed a great nation, a great culture
that eventually was done in by their
own greed, or simply their own
arrogance
granted, there were a few cultures
that merely disappeared without a trace
leaving little, if anything, about them
but they too were also gone
same as the others
yes, Coyote answered
as if reading my thoughts
their arrogance
that is the downfall of humans,
their arrogance
they believe themselves to be,
they have always believed themselves to be,
superior to not only animals
but to nature itself
the journal seemed to sigh
a great sigh
and it appeared to glow
just a little less
i only wanted to teach you,
to show to you
that moment when you realize
you are awake and dreaming
simultaneously, can be one of the
greatest pleasures taken for granted
in what you know as life
but what nature calls
your vision.
i heard a slight ringing
in my ears
which turned into a subtle hum
just below the threshold of sound
i looked around the room
trying to identify it
you will not find it here,
Coyote offered
the noise you are hearing
is the universe, rather
it is life in the universe
all of life, at once, singing
it was not exactly an
unpleasant sound
more like a soft lullaby
one that wrapped me within it
why are you showing me this, i asked
what is the purpose?
Coyote spoke slowly
as i have told you, over many eons
we have attempted to bring magic
or the knowledge
of magic
to humans
while i must admit we have failed
to change any of mankind's behavior
we have been successful in reaching
a few souls over the years
i motioned to the books on the table,
those were the people that wrote these books,
i stated as more of a statement, than a question
yes, they were, Coyote replied
in nature there are many substances
that allow you to peer through the veil
between dream and awakened states
a few have described it as the
merging of conscious, sub-conscious and unconscious
i merely refer to it as giving you
vision
i have taken the liberty of introducing
many of these naturally occurring substances
into your daily routine
i tried to think of how this was possible
but could not easily understand it
at all
the water from your well has had
kava root, damiana leaf, and
green tea leaf extracts
added to it for some time
they are used to relax you, to put you into
a calm and accepting state
of course, there are also the more potent plants
that i have taught you to use;
mushrooms, jimson weed, or Datura,
and of course, Salvia divinorum
the sage of the diviners
i introduced you to peyote
during the sweat in order to
remove you from your consciousness
so you might better experience
that which the gods wanted to show you
you have been doing this for some time?
i asked with incredulousness
yes. since that time when you raided my garden
when the ancestors first appeared to you,
it was decided then that i should groom you
in preparation for this knowledge
you mean the time i spent hallucinating
in front of three burning oak tree stumps?
you
know much better than that, Coyote answered
there was a quiet that had settled
about the room
outside of the slight hum,
apparently from the universe,
no other sound could be heard
a mermaid peeked in
from the ceiling
winking at me
what is the deal with the mermaids, i asked
they were assigned to help watch over you
when I am not around
but why mermaids, i continued to ask
why not, Coyote replied
they are wonderful creatures
capable of many things
they have been travelling the galaxies
for hundreds of thousands of years
they enjoy the oceans of earth
and when they heard of what i had proposed
to the gods, for you, they insisted on
helping with the entire project
so i have been a project, i shouted indignantly
a truly fine one at that, he rebutted, almost gleefully
both mermaids appeared
throwing me a kiss as they did
they genuinely like you, Coyote laughed
i had to admit
the appearance of the mermaids
never once caused me alarm
in fact, i enjoyed their company
however short their visits might be
they have been written about
for centuries, Coyote told me
surely you have read about them?
naturally, i had read of many instances
of mermaids appearing before people
though i had always thought they were
more of a metaphor than anything else
metaphor? Coyote roared
again apparently able to read my thoughts
they are as real as you and i!
the mermaids gleefully swam
above me before vanishing
once again, through my ceiling
sort of like fairies? i timidly asked
nothing like fairies, Coyote retorted
mermaids are mermaids
fairies are fairies
how is this difficult for you?
Coyote sat shaking his head
giving me strange, sideways glances
as he appeared to be in deep conversation
with someone else
the gods have decided
they were wrong about you,
i was wrong about you,
they have directed me to allow this
education, if you will,
to go no further
Coyote was very solemn
he pulled out his pipe
a time or two
but always put it back
he looked over at the journal
with more than a bit of sadness
in his eyes
they have said since you refuse
to look at the journal
they wish to keep it from you
i am to take it back
a great sadness filled the room
it was as if the journal itself
was grieving
i could feel it lamenting a great loss
as i watched its glow
slowly disappear
Coyote, too, seemed to be
lamenting a great loss
he feebly reached out for the journal
stopping short of picking it up
from the table
i am truly sorry it came to this, he whispered
i was really hoping you would be the one
i was left at a loss for words,
nothing came to my mind
as Coyote gingerly picked up the journal
i found the courage to ask him one
last question
why did you believe me to be the one, i asked
the one for what?
look at these books in front of you,
Coyote said gesturing to the many books
that lay open upon the table
when were they written, he asked
i took a slow sweep of the table
noticing that nearly every book
had been written centuries before
that’s right, Coyote nodded in agreement
centuries ago
despite my best attempts,
and those of the gods, and all of nature
mankind still rejects the basics
of all life
that life is all around us, i said
it is everything to every thing
the journal glowed just a tad more
as Coyote slowly withdrew from it
everything is connected to
every thing, in all ways, i continued
by not acknowledging this
we are neglecting nature itself
a tiny droplet of water
fell upon the journal
as it slowly opened
the mermaids had appeared
once more, reaching down
opening the sacred tome
i watched, transfixed
as the journal began to glow
its familiar glow
a great white egret
called to me from my window
joining with a host of birds
animals of every kind
raccoons, squirrels, rabbits, deer
the great egret urged me
to look into the journal
the mermaids had opened the journal
laying it flat upon the table before me
petals from two blood red dahlias
fell onto the journal
i peered into the journal
aware that Coyote
with his trickster smile
was sitting across from me
lighting his enchanted pipe.
a brilliant, golden light
shone out from the journal
as i looked into it
i had the sensation of looking
over a tremendous waterfall
the water roaring down to the valley below
it’s massive energy conquering everything
in its path
instead of water, however,
it was imagery that was flowing
tens of thousands of images
hundreds of thousands
all flowing over a thin precipice
that was the journal itself
i felt a tremendous sense
of vertigo, and realized the mermaids
were holding me from behind
so that i might peer into the journal
without fear of falling in
as i gained my bearings
immersed in the incredible flow before me
i understood at once that this
was language in its highest form
while there was an exceptionally large
roaring sound that accompanied the imagery
the sounds of words, of sentences
any articulation of sound at all
was not heard
as i gazed into the journal
looking closely at where the images lay
i began to sense a compilation
of a very long story
i saw the Great Pyramid of Giza,
i saw El Castillo, the pyramid of Chichen Itza,
the Great Pyramid of Cholula,
the Pyramids of Xi’an in China,
the Temple at Angkor Wat
the images went on and on, for what seemed eternity
each image clearly revealed to me
in an instant
then another would appear
great temples of the ancient world
swirled into view
i witnessed Göbekli Tepe being built
many times over
watched closely
as people struggled to build
the great stone wall at the entrance
of Greece’s Theopetra Cave
Jericho’s mighty walls came into view
Catal Huyuk formed in the blink of an eye
Byblos was seen teeming with people
Varanasi gleamed in its glory
the images were a dazzling flurry
of a history i had only read about
but now i saw them complete
in all their glory
the urgency of the images
seemed to halter
and i sensed a change
in the rhythm of their flow
lexical glyphs appeared on animals
i could not recognize
calling for me to follow them
yet, not a sound was heard
i watched as these animals transformed
into readily identifiable forms
there were animals, birds, fish, insects
of all size and shape
land masses grew and fell away
giving way to vast oceans
before rising again
as entire continents
people wrapped in furs
struggled against enormous beasts
banding together as one to survive
not only the great beasts
but to survive their surroundings
as well
it became apparent to me
i was witnessing the evolution
of our planet,
of our people
i saw vast deserts of sand and stone
incredible swaths of rich jungles
that went on as far as i could see
throughout it all there remained
only the subtle hum that had replaced
the initial roar of sound i heard earlier,
the hum Coyote told me
was the sound of the Universe
a particularly brilliant glyph
began to rise from the journal
i watched as it rose
from the turmoil before me,
rising to rest just at eye level
i became aware this one
particular glyph
was no longer a part
of the journal
fascinated, hypnotized by its brilliance
i watched it split before me
turning into countless other glyphs
all equally brilliant
until a darkness came over all
i realized i was watching space
not inside of space, but from afar
i watched, transfixed,
as planets formed
entire galaxies formed
stars, comets, asteroids, meteors,
dwarf planets, suns, moons
the entire universe unfolded
in front of me
i became aware of multiple dimensions
time ceased to exist
i watched as it trailed off into
a million myriad directions
all connected together
yet separate and unique
tied together
by one, simple image
a single conch
held tightly by the
connectedness of everything
to every thing
at once it became clear to me
all that Coyote had shown me
all i had witnessed
by viewing the journal
made resounding sense
Coyote was correct
when he told me
all is real, nothing is real
I watched in rapt fascination
as the journal began to close
the flow of imagery
appearing to reverse itself
its once brilliant glow
replaced by a dull
lifeless beacon that shone
searching
I tried to follow the beacon
but no matter how hard I tried
I could not follow it
it seemed to move further way
each time I fixed on its position
eventually, I saw the mermaids
close the journal
it sat on my table
slowly breathing
as though it was resting
a tremendous sadness
overcame me
I sat at my table sobbing
images of forests, jungles, deserts,
temples, people, animals, planets,
all of it burning into me until I felt
as if I would burst
you must not allow yourself
to become overwhelmed,
though that is easier said
than done
Coyote was still sitting across from me
his enchanted pipe releasing the most
marvelous smoke I had ever seen
I watched it rise from his pipe
slowly circling his head
drifting languidly into the air above him
forming what appeared to be
a perfect representation
of a conch
you planned this all along
didn’t you, I asked my trickster friend
you just needed a little nudge,
he quietly chuckled
the gods never told you to remove
the journal from me, did they?
let’s say that they encouraged me
to prod you a little harder
and leave it at that
I heard the mermaids giggling
as they rose to leave
blowing me kisses
as they left to the ether
will I see them again, I asked
most assuredly, Coyote replied
here, he pushed a cup of tea towards me
I thought you might enjoy a cup of tea
does it have special substances in it, I asked
does it matter if it does, the trickster replied
the journal was now still
laying on my table perfectly quiet
no movement, no glow
simply an inert object on my table
in front of me
is that it, then, I asked Coyote
you mean, is the journal's task complete?
it is. but you are far from finished,
as cliché as it sounds
you’ve only just begun
what was the purpose of all this, I asked the trickster
Coyote looked at me a great while
leaning over to refill my tea cup
which I could not recall drinking
as I have told you, many attempts
have been made to enlighten humans
to the magic around them, Coyote
sat back from refilling my tea
we are trying once more
with you
Coyote reached again
for his enchanted pipe
am I supposed to write about this,
am I to attempt at converting others
to this knowledge
you can do what you want with it,
Coyote told me as he rose to leave,
grabbing his journal from the table as he did so
you
have had an extraordinary adventure
take some time to reflect on all you’ve seen
go sit on your dock, meditate upon the questions
that roar through your mind
by the way, Coyote added
have you noticed your dock is in need
of painting?
and with that he left my home
I sat in silence for I do not know
how long
I remember looking through my windows
and seeing the sun begin to rise
I walked out of my door and headed down
the path to my dock, noticing it really did
need to be painted
I sat in one of the old, stuffed chairs
and looked out over the lake
the sun was coming out,
birds were flying
sounds of life filled the air
try as I might, I could not begin
to think as to how to begin
where did I start
what would I say
you’ll think of something, I heard a voice giggling
I quickly turned and scanned the lake
but saw not a thing
only a fish jumping
out of the water
to catch its morning breakfast
or perhaps it was a mermaids tale
splashing in the water
was there really
a difference
I pondered this for a while
before noticing
winter had finally come to our lake
the fires of summer had receded
and a deep winter chill
had taken its place.
Find the place,
the trickster taught me,
where the sun
rises in the West
and animals
breathe water
for air
where whales once again
become great spaceships
and magic
is the order
of the day.
Other works by dave boles:
Do Aluminum Chickens Eat Metal Feed?
Media Dissertation Of A Balding Man
A Small Answer To A Large Question
ALIVE IN AMERICA: Politics,
Psychedelics & An Illuminated Monkey
CABO DAYS
4th Floor: Paranoia, Depression
& Other States Of Mind
Confessions Of A Black Ink Junkie
15 Days To Slow The Curve -
One Mans Journey Into The
Heartland Of Absurdity
Paths Of Emptiness
About The Wedding
Coyote Magic
OFFERINGS
Homage To A Word
Visions Of A Merciful Land
Excursions Along The Way
WAR
dave (bodhi) boles, works as a Publisher, Editor, Writer, and
Designer.
Founder of the magazine Primal Urge, it led him to create
Neural Impulse
Publications, Cold River Press, and Bodhidharma Publishing. His
publications,
editorials, writing, graphic design, and artwork have appeared both
nationally
and internationally.
An eclectic traveler and artist, dave is known to drift in changing
directions
at the drop of a hat, having worked as a High Tower Rigger; Long Haul
Trucker;
Radio Talk Show Host; Renaissance Faire Magician; Costume and
Bodice
Merchant; a short stint once as a Life Insurance salesman that ended
rather
poorly, and a Corporate Mercenary for hire.
A devoted collector of tattoos, dave is also a lifelong gear head and
speed
freak, customizing cars, trucks, and motorcycles whenever he can.
The protege of acclaimed poet and alternative publisher Ben L. Hiatt,
dave
embraces our ever-changing literary and political structure while
continuing
to ponder Hiatt’s school of Okie Surrealism and how it might fit in with
this
modern age of high tech.
He has several chapbooks, including Balding Dissertation Of A
Balding Man,
A Small Answer To A Large Question, Do Aluminum Chickens Eat Metal
Feed?,
and Confessions Of A Black Ink Junkie, among others, as well as
many full-length
books, OFFERINGS, ALIVE IN AMERICA, 15 DAYS TO SLOW THE
CURVE,
COYOTE MAGIC, and more.
Obtaining a Doctorate in Divinity, he founded The Church Of The
Illuminated Monkey, where he holds the position of Gringo Shaman.
His lifelong friend, Mescalito, still keeps watch over him to this day,
sending
a Red Hawk to check in on him from time to time. He resides with his
wife, Mrs.
America, and a collection of animals at Lake House - the Illuminated
Monkey’s
Home For Wayward Poets And Socially Bereft Humans.
COYOTE VISION (first printing), is published in an edition of 200 copies.
Text: Body is Adobe Garamond Pro, 12pt leading 15pt. Headings are in Book Anitqua Bold, 14pt leading 16pt, stretched 124 percent horizontally, with a horizontal tracking of +25. Page numbers are Adobe Caslon Pro, 11.5 pt. Author bio photo is by Mrs. America.
Cover: Book title and author title is based on C720-Deco, modified, beveled, stretched and airbrushed. Back cover blurb is based on Pare, modified, beveled, stretched and airbrushed. Back cover photograph of the author is by Alex Monroe, digitally enhanced by Bodhi.
Cover artwork, Life, Unfurled is original digital art by Bodhi.
Paper: Interior pages are printed on 60# white 3.7 Caliper, 541 PPI. Soft Cover is printed on 12pt Cover stock 541 PPI and gloss laminated before binding.
Printing: Text was printed on an Oce 6250 digital printer. Cover was printed using a Xerox Versant 3100.
Binding: Book is soft cover perfect bound.